Dream

21-

Dream.

It was a dream, wasn’t it?

You weren’t really here.

I thought you were telling me,

How to fix myself.

How to look better.

How dared you?

How dared I?

We needed to live our lives.

One year of bliss.

One year of worry.
One year of hell.

Three regular years.

You wanted more.

In the end, you needed more.

All you had to do was tell me.

But on a note

You bid

Farewell to our three

Normal years.

And I?

Wept. Of course.

On a note?

You left endless wondering of a mind

That needn’t to be punished like that.

Coward.

At least I always said how I felt.

I guess you were not the right person

To tell? Who was I supposed to,

Sometimes in sorrow,

Trust with the hollow of

My worried mind?

Not you. I now that now.

I wish I had then. I was always strong.

Why did you have to wait?

A string that is long due to be cut

Becomes brittle in the end.

I had the right to hear it.

Do you think I didn’t know that

You longed for someone else

In your mind?

You were unfaithful.

You didn’t have to touch.

Turns out, a broken heart

Can break even more

When hit with the right note.

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

Twenty-four

24-

Twenty-four

I think I did love you.

I’m not sure I ever did.

Yet I know I did.

I could try to be sad

But why?

I don’t remember loving you.

They say I did.

They say I gave you all of my heart.

They say we had a life.

I could try to be sad.

The memory of our lives

Has gone by.

Under the stars, I wonder if I

Should be sad.

I don’t remember.

It was too hard.

Losing you was, they say,

Never in our plans.

I could try to be sad,

I could cut these flowers and

Throw them up in the sky to

Watch them fall like our love fell.

But I am not sad.

I know I loved you.

The pain was too deep.

My mind sailed away.

And now I’m back only to

Find out that I forget

How much I cared.

I could try to be sad, I could

Try to cry under the stars, but they

Say it was your choice. I think

I loved you. Maybe I still do. Do I?

I don’t know.

I could try to be sad for what we had.

My mind is lucid now. It went to Hell

And back. I could try to salvage what we had,

But why?

You left.

I could say: The stars are beautiful, my love.

Let’s go and sit outside.

I could ask: Why do your eyes shine so brightly?

Is it to make my heart this happy?

But I have forgotten what it was to love

In such a way.

I could take your hand and caress it around my face.

I could take your tears and dry them with my skin.

I could write about the time,

That I don’t remember now,

You gave me a ring under

The rain, kissing me and

Asking me to always stay.

I could write about many things,

But I’m not sad.

I don’t love you anymore.

But in days gone by, maybe I did.

This is the last time

I kiss you goodbye.

My hand and my pen will no

Longer meet with your name

In mind.

This is my last prose to you.

I promised my beating heart,

That the one who called herself

For so long

The love of my life,

Would be out of my head at last.

Did this really happen to us?

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

The Cabin

11-

The Cabin

I could only imagine that

The fields had flowers, but

I was inside the cabin

That I helped build.

I didn’t know there would be a lock within.

I had not clue the cabin was for me.

I didn’t think I wouldn’t

Be able to breathe.

But I could see the stars.

I didn’t know the color of the flowers.

I couldn’t smell their perfume.

But I knew they were there.

I laid. I woke. I ate. I laid again.

When I laid, I could see the stars.

Could I get out?

Come with me! You, who weeps to leave!

Turn a new page and turn the key to the

Door that will let us go! But... how can I leave?

The roof over my head, the security of my sheets,

The sustenance that I need, I had it all within.

But the flowers.... I could smell them.

Do I have to stay?

In between guilt and need, I found

A small well fashioned rod and I opened the door.

I saw the flowers. The stars were bright.

The air was crisp. But, now that I am here…

Should I leave?

If I step on that stoop, is up to you…

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

Today

19-

Today

Do whatever you want.

Do it right away.

Don’t wait for another day.

Time to do.

Time to shine.

Let go of the bed.

Get inspired today.

Think about the places

You’ve wanted to go for ages

And get going right away.

Go! Don’t wait! If you wait,

You may never go.

Just look at Scarlet,

Red with anger,

Never gone.

Or, rest.

Give your feet a break.

Break the cycle of stress.

Take a nap and

Drink some wine,

But don’t deny that

You still feel deep inside

The demand of the sun

Asking you to get out today.

Follow your inspiration,

Don’t stay back. Silence the

Desires of the pull of the dark.

Open your eyes.

Fresh, brand new skies await.

I’ll go first.

Follow me.

One foot out; breathe right in.

Come on out. Don’t let the anger

Get you back down.

Don’t cry. It’s over.

Today it didn’t hurt too much.

She’s gone. You are alone.

It’s ok to miss her, but now you

Are free to whisper, how

Good it feels to be you today.

Smile.

Solitude isn’t that bad.

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

Caress

16-

Caress

Caress the air and touch the light,

Smell the wind that’s by your side.

Quiet… Here comes the storm.

Silence. She feels so soft.

No heart is lonely tonight. The rain

Accompanies your broken heart.

The sun smiles at your delightful existence.

The leaves dance for your eyes,

And the grass whispers to your ears.

On the night that she left,

The sky was quiet. I thought I was alone.

I asked for mercy, but

Absolution would not come.

She said ‘maybe’ and I begged ‘stay.’

But the rain was quiet,

And the air was gone,

And the wind had not scent,

And I thought I was alone.

I stared at the window

Hoping she would return.

But the air came instead to caress

My broken soul.

And the rain stopped its silence,

And the leaves began to pour

When my tears started to flow; and I realized that I

Was not alone.

Someone is always there, I thought.

Not who I expected,

But what better company than the

Stillness of your cries and the calm of your soul?

It hurts to be without her,

But I love being with me. For the rain

Will always speak,

The air will always blow, and

The wind will always bring its fragrance of time and old. 

Time to learn. Time to cope. Time to show

My bones that I can walk on my own.

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

Silk

13-

Silk

The silk of your speech.

I am lost within

The touch of your touch;

The skill of your fingertips.

I’ll die tonight a small death in the dark.

Whisper how tender your desire is for my skin.

Let’s go.

It’s time.

You and I could be

Walking along a bridge, smiling. Gazing.

But we didn’t want that first glance.

We wanted tonight.

We missed the first sweet kiss.

We skipped the smile and the flirting eyes

And we came here today.

No embrace, no words.

The touch of your skin will be my hello.

The caress of your hands will be our first date.

The approach of your hips will be our first kiss.

Your being in my soul will be our communion.

And in the morning, we’ll let go.

I wish you luck in your future life. 

Thank you and goodbye.

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro

Learning

18-

Learning

I have learned to live in the present.

There are times I concentrate in the future.

Sometimes I think of the past.

And that is when I cry.

©2012 Cassandra Huidobro